My mother in law always says mean things? Need some advice?

My mother in law makes crude comments about my sons sexuality he just told us that he is gay he is 17. Me and my husband accept him and grateful that he told us we love him none the less. Our families a side from my mother in law have been very accepting and supportive. She is hurting him as they used to be so close now she just ridicules him. We have stopped going for visits I don鈥檛 like seeing my son upset. We don鈥檛 know what to do? I fear for my sons well-being.My mother in law always says mean things? Need some advice?
You and your husband have made the decision to love and accept your child no matter what - his grandmother should as well. If she can't - tell her to butt out! Your husband should back you up on this, seeing that she's being hurtful to your son.





Your son will face enough adversity - his family should be his safe place where he can expect acceptance no matter what. If grandma isn't going to go along with this, she doesn't get to be a part of his life (and yours and your husband's by association).





You and your husband should tell her this (calmly and politely), and she can take it or leave it.





Buuuuuut then again I may not be the best one to give MIL advice. I've got a handful of a mother in law as well!My mother in law always says mean things? Need some advice?
talk with your son and ask how he feels about what your mother-in-law says. ask him if he wants to talk with her or be around her. make sure you know what his feelings are, not just your own reactions.


perhaps you can talk with her and let her know that one who loves her is being hurt by her.


she is of a different generation and doesn't know how to handle this change. she dreamed of her grandson and his future in a whole different way. change for her is difficult.
I think you are doing what is best for your Son by keeping him from your MIL. Sometimes you can't change people, and a situation like yours really brings out a persons ';true colors';. Your MIL might come around. But until she can be nice to your Son, and not make him feel bad, I would continue to keep him from her. Good Luck, you sound like a great parent :)
tell him to deal with the negativity and learn from this.


learn that his step mother never really loved him and after he has accepted that being around her won't effect him as much as it will if he runs away from the situation.
Maybe you can have a talk with her. She obviously loves him if they used to be really close and it sounds like this hurts her and she does not have the emotional tools to deal with it correctly. Please note, I am not saying that what she is doing is ok in any way, shape or form.





Tell her that you can understand how his being gay is a big disappointment for her (Not trying to be rude here, it's just true that this is sincerely hurtful for some family members to accept). Perhaps it wasn't easy for you either? Point out to her that whatever goal she is trying to accomplish with her behavior is really not working at all. Tell her that it is ok to separate the person from from the sexual orientation in the sense that: She can love the person while totally disliking the fact that he is gay.





She cannot be pushed into liking that, and that's ok too. But she DOES have to be respectful and hopefully, unconditionally loving.
You can't really do anything to change her opinion about homosexuality, but you can tell he to keep her rude comments to herself. Just because she doesn't like your son's sexual preference, that doesn't mean that she has the right to say hurtful things to him. Tell her how she hurts your son's feelings, and if she keeps it up she will totally erase herself from her grandchild's life.
you should talk to her.. like rele its not her freaking son.. say that you guys are okay with that. its not her business just like tell her to back off and tell her it doesn't matter that hes gay and it shouldn't matter at all.
From Expierience I Know What Youre Going Through. My Grandparents kinda pushed me out of the loop when they found out i was gay. I heard them make extremely rude remarks to me, i pretty much just ignored it or made a clever remark. What my mom did was talk to them, at first they didnt seem to like the idea so we pushed them out, they came around a couple of months later. but i think more than anything is they need time to realize that they have a good grandson, gay or not. so give them time if that doesnt work then it would be best to cut the visits its not good to be around that negativity.
I too have a gay teenage son and if my mother-in-law couldn't accept his choice in life, i would tell her not to come near him or our family until she grows up, the narrow minded COW! In the end it will be her loss not your sons, he is better off without her in his life. And well done on supporting your son.m
You think a big surprise everyone has known he is gay for about 15 of those years. She is just spiteful ignore her she is just a *****. Have your spouse deal with her not you. Have him tell her this is it get it or get out. Life is to short to put up with a dumb granny. It is hard enough to be a gay person don't need any haters with the same blood.